As a Friend I am convinced that baptism is primarily a spiritual reality. For one reason the physical ritual includes all kinds of Christians who claim the other kinds aren't even Christians. They attack each other verbally and often have slaughtered each other in so many Christian-sponsored wars.
How can there be ONE baptism in one Spirit when that happens? Or when Calvinists say there are no gifts of the Spirit, Evangelicals claim the Bible is inerrant, Fundamentalists claim the Bible is scientifically accurate and that evolution is a satanic lie; Lutherans and Catholics think that the literal act of baptism saves while other Christians think the very opposite? There are many Christians who support killing unarmed civilians in war, using torture, ignoring the plea of the poor and the dying. Where is the love of Christ in this? Where is the Spirit of their formal baptism?
It seems rather that true baptism is spiritual and unseen, when God's Spirit begins to slowly transform a person toward the Truth, the Good, and the Loving.
Physical acts of baptism may be used by some who derive much comfort or inspiration from outward signs, but the danger always remains. Allegedly most Germans of the WWI and WWII era were baptized yet that didn't show forth in their lives as they went out to slaughter other Christians of the Allies, and Allied, baptized Christians returned the evil favor urged on by the evangelist Billy Sunday. And don't forget the Thirty Years War, the American Civil War, and the English Civil War where Cromwell's and the King's forces killed each other for Jesus Christ.
No wonder Jesus wept.